PutinToon 45 - It's the Duck, Stupid

HUCK FINN COMMENTS:  "Recession would work in Democrats' favor," was the title of a recent New York Times article. I guess Obama and Hillary are praying for recession to be announced by economists and the recession gurus.

How to you become a recession guru? I tried! Monster.com and HotJobs.com don't have job listing for recession gurus. Do I apply at the Federal Reserve? The White House?

Campaign 2008 is a special Year. In the last century, it's only happened three times (1932, 1960 and 1980) that there was

an economic slump in a presidential election year.

This is a big opportunity for me, Huck Finn, Chairman of the Amerikan Party, since it was "our" party that announced the recession way before any of the other parties were even thinking about economy. We so much believe America is in recession (just like 33% of Americans) that we own the domain, It's the Recession, Stupid. ^TM

I'd like to apply for RECESSION GURU status since we're currently in recession and I need a second job to pay off the debt from all the shenanigan activities conducted by congress, such as:

(a) continuous funding of Iraq and Afghanistan war, to the tune of $12 billion per month

(b) continuous support of the war on the Middle Class by not addressing the issues of the sub prime mortgage fiasco and foreclosures

(c) holding congressional hearings on steroids with Roger Clemens and his trainer, whatever his name is

The ship, Ameritanic, is sinking and what does Congress decide to do? They hold hearings on whether Roger Clemens has used steroids. Can you believe the insult to the American taxpayer?

Does anyone really care whether Roger Clemens used steroids or not when the economy is going down the toilet?

Does anyone follow baseball anymore?

Football, not baseball is America's major sport. So, why worry about steroid scandals in baseball? As long as NFL doesn't have a steroid scandal, we can forget about spending tax payer money to determine whether Roger Clemens is a liar. The sad thing is that in America, Roger Clemens is already guilty, because in America today you're guilty until proven innocent.

I refuse to believe Roger is a liar until the law, backed by the American Constitution, proves in a trial by jury, that Roger Clemens is guilty.

Maybe George W Bush used steroids during the last seven years. That's the only sound explanation for our reason to (a) start war in Iraq, (b) flex our muscle with Iran and (c) pick fights with Putin and Russia.

Bottom line: American taxpayers are paying for it with (a) increase in national debt, (b) $12 billion per month war costs and (c) Ameritanic landing in our ports.

If you're wondering whether Ameritanic has landed, Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernake recently announced "Economy is sluggish until later this year."

What this really means is that Bernake knows the economy's in recession but doesn't want to admit it because he doesn't want to lose his job. Nobody loves to give their boss the bad news.

We may need some major steroids to get the Foreclosure sign out  America's front yard. I don't think tax rebates are going to do it.

I wonder if Putin has ever used steroids. Most likely he didn't have to use steroids because he's a black belt in Judo. I hope and pray that I don't offend Putin with this question because if I had a choice of being forced to meet Putin or Bush in a dark alley to settle the score... well... hmm... da, that is a hard question to answer.

What would Putin do? Would he call the recession (a) sluggish economy, (b) recovering economy or (c) duck economy.

Quack, quack, quack. It's the duck, stupid.

Huck Finn, Chairman, The Amerikan Party

"Smart-Ass Politics for Smart People.” ^TM